the first few weeks with you

Wednesday, January 7, 2015

casey james photography

-seeing you for the first time and hearing your cry was the easily the BEST moment of my life. 

-you were a comfort for me during the worst moment of my life. getting the phone call about your uncle tony's death. 

-we brought you home from the hospital on tony's birthday. 

-tony got to meet you the night before he died. we ate pizza together and laughed our heads off. he said that you look like me! when him and your nana left to head to wyoming i cried to nana saying, "mom, i don't think i can do this without you! what if i can't?!"  i remember tony saying, "sami you are going to be such a good mom. you can do this!" tony and your nana forgot something at my house so tony had to come back in to grab it. i got to hug him again (he gives the BEST hugs) and tell him i love him. the last thing i said to him was "remember who you are!!!" which is kind of a joke with us hansens. i'm sure you'll hear it plenty growing up. 

-the day tony passed away we got so many smiles from you. i know it was tony talking to you. i hope you will feel him close to you as you grow up. 

-there were moments these past 2 weeks that i've not wanted to eat or sleep or do anything but cry, but you gave me the strength to take care of myself because i looked at your face and knew i needed to be healthy for you. 

-there have been moments where i felt like giving up, but because the kindness of all the people around us i was able to keep going. people are so giving and kind. you will learn as you grow older and learn of tony's death that the world has so much evil, but it's also so full of beautiful christ-like people.  

-you have the most expressive face just like me! you also have my nose and lips. 

-you are laid back and sweet just like your dad. 

-you love when mom sings taylor swift to you. 

-your dad is the best at calming you down. 

-when we come back from running errands bernie has started to be more excited to see you than me! 

-you love car rides. 

-you always have this serious look on your face with your cute little furrowed eyebrows! it's the best. 

-you LOVE sleeping on me and your dad's chest! we love it too. 

-you've already taught me so much river. i'm so lucky to be your mom. thank you for being patient with me during these rough times. 



  1. This is so sweet. I'm so happy you have that adorable bundle of joy through these hard times. Love you lots!