to river

Friday, February 20, 2015

-Well bud you had your first ER visit last week! You caught RSV (from me or your Dad) at just 8 weeks old and were having trouble breathing so we rushed you in. It was a hard week. You were so sick! But you got through it! You're such a tough little guy. You got better just in time for Prez Day weekend with the family. One of my favorite weekends of the year. After we all left each other after Tony's funeral in December we would call each other crying on our hard days saying, "At least President Day weekend is coming up!"

-It was a good weekend home in Wyoming. It was different. There was a big fat void with Tony not there. I cried a lot. I laughed a lot. It was so good to be with family.

-You rode a snowmobile for the first time and you did great. It was Uncle Tony's sled so I hope he was watching!

-We had our first annual Hansen Family Talent Show! You danced with me to "Cry me a River" by JT. It was awesome.

-All of your cousins love you but boy do JJ and Kai love you. They followed us around all weekend asking to hold you. JJ said she wanted to fly to Logan and babysit you for a few days. She's only 9 but I'd probably let her. ;) 


-We had a few family pictures taking the day before everyone left and it was really hard. It just sucks having Tony gone ya know? It just freaking sucks. I'm crying in all of these pictures so this is the best one I could find hahah. When I'm sad I cry. You will learn as you grow older I wear my heart on my sleeve. 


-It was hard leaving everyone and coming back to real life but Nana had all of our home videos from when we were little made into dvds. She gave them to us all and I've been watching them all week long. It's kind of my new favorite thing to do. 

 -You had your first shots a few days ago and you were kind of a little stud muffin for them. You cried for like 2 seconds and then slept all day. 

-This week had some good days and a couple bad days. I've made a couple mistakes this week. I was mean and ugly to someone. I was trying to stand up for myself but it ended badly. Why do I do and say stupid things?? I was talking to Papa about it and he said, "well I guess you're human."  

-Your Nana turned 54 this week. You love her so much already and you are so dang lucky to have her as a grandma. She's kind of a super hero Riv. 

-No matter what mood you're in we can ALWAYS get a smile from you. I tell Ryan all the time that your smile reminds me of sunshine. It brightens everything. You just shine River boy. 


-My second favorite thing you do is stretch your arms above your head and yawn when you wake up. It's something you would see on a cartoon ya know? I need to take a picture next time.. 

-Ryan and I are planning a few hikes for this summer and we are ordering a little back pack thing for you to ride in. With a name like River we are hoping you like the outdoors as much as us! If you're a chess playing indoorsmen we might need to change your name. ;)

-We love you River. I hope you feel it. 


to river

Sunday, February 1, 2015


-Two of the cutest moments happened this week with Bernie and your Dad. You love them so much!


-You have been so much fun these past few days. The non-stop crying has simmered down a bit. (for now anyway) You poor colicky babe! (and poor us...) I've been off dairy for 3 weeks and I sure miss my pizza but it's worth it. Your poor belly couldn't handle it all! And holy cow I'm so glad that Oreos exist. They are vegan thank goodness and they help with my dairy cravings.

- You're still a tall skinny guy, but we are slowing getting some fat on you!

-I  started you on a sleeping schedule this week (I honestly didn't know I was supposed to do that until a few days ago hahah) It's helped a lot with your grumpiness. 

-I've always loved newborns but I've always been a little intimidated by them. People always said that will change when it's your own. Ummm no. Way scarier when it's your own. But you're getting bigger and less fragile so Dad and I are starting to be a little less freaked out by you.

-I over heard your Dad singing Simon & Garfunkel to you last night when he was putting you to sleep. I think you prefer that over Taylor Swift because he puts you to sleep a lot faster than I can. 

-After your Dad put you to sleep the other night and we were laying in bed I said to him, "River and I starting to be such good friends."  

-You have so many cousins that love you already. You still have a few more of the Falateas to meet. You'll love them! You kept watching Owen and smiling at him when he was at our house a few days ago. I was freaking out and saying, "Guys look at him smile at Owen!! Oh my gosshhhhhhhh!" I think I even clapped my hands for you because I was so happy about it. Your Auntie Jodie, Uncle Clay, and Dad looked at me like I was crazy. It's just fun to see you connecting with people. It makes me proud! 

-You loooovvvee your carseat. You fall asleep like 5 seconds after I put you in it.

-You hate being swaddled but I do it anyway because you don't stay asleep if you are out of it. 

-Bernie slept by your crib for the first time a couple nights ago. It just melted my heart when I walked into your room that morning! 

-You love going on runs with me and Bernie. You look up at the sky with your cute eyes squinting! 

-I miss your Uncle Tony so much. I hate how the world and everyone just keeps moving and going and we are all still trying to figure out how to live in a world where Tony is gone from. I know it's how it goes but it still hurts. I'm so angry. It's all just not fair. 

-I'm still so amazed with how wonderful people are. People are so giving and thoughtful. 

-When I was pregnant with you I was able to see Tony at least once a week and we would talk about how excited we were to meet you and I would fill him in on everything going on in our life. I would always poke my big belly out for him so he could see it getting bigger and bigger. He would always laugh and say, "Woah! Gettin big Sam!" I just hate that I can't talk to him about you. I know he would get a kick out of you looking like Marky Mark. 

-It's so fun getting to know you more. You are starting to engage with us more and it's just the best thing ever.

-You are sooo active and strong! I think you are going to be a wild man. 

-I'm counting down the days until President's Day weekend. I need to see all my siblings! And they need to hold you and snuggle you! 

-I've had a few people tell me you look like Kase! He was thrilled when he heard. He told Auntie Storm, "I must be famous!" 

-You get your dimple from your Dad but I posted a video the other day and a couple people said, "He has Tony's dimples!" I love that I see a little of your Dad and your Uncle every time you smile.

-Your Auntie Jessie came to visit yesterday and we went and walked the Bonneville Shoreline Trail. It got me really excited for all the hiking we are going to do this year with you!




-You are such a smily little babe. Holy cow! We are loving it!


-Every day is an adventure with you bud. I love being your mom!